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My mouse, wip by ashkey My mouse, wip by ashkey
Young Bramblepaw takes his sweet little mousy to the fresh kill pile to feed the decrepit elders. He will become a gud warrior I just no it

~

This is a WIP and I can't decide if it's very good or not (critiques encouraged!). I wanted to animate more kitties and I picked Brambley because I did Tigerstar here [link] and I wanted to use the same palette but change the markings. They aren't working on the hind leg though so I need to fix this.

Was going to be "trotting" but I couldn't find reference and then I realised cats don't do that. I'll have to animate a dog next and try again. For some reason I drew every frame (16) and rendered it at 18 fps (why??).

Will scrap once I upload the next part, which won't be an unending loop. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT... DUN DUN DUN


Bramblepaw in his apprentice days ~ from Warriors series by Erin Hunter
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:iconcoilheart:
First of all, I just want to comment on how good your animation skills and movement judgements are. I mean, seriously, give yourself some credit, this is really phenomenal. The movement of the forelegs and the chest are probably the best part of this. I would say to probably add more wave to the tail...I can't really picture a cat walking with his tail so stiff and only the tip twitching. Also, for some reason, it seems as if something about the walk isn't quite right. Perhaps you could have added a little bit more movement to the mid-body section of the cat? Ugh, I can't quite put my finger on it. But ANYWHO, this is truly amazing! I can't wait to see more from you!
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
23 out of 23 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconblackbrier:
This is amazing. Really one of the best animations i have seen here since i joined. I love the look on his face! so cute and determined! You did really well with the body angles and the movement.

(You wouldn't happen to have cats of your own to go by would you?)

The only real thing that doesn't seem to fit is how jerky his movements are. A cat has this graceful gate and Brablepaw's legs seem very jerky for a cats walk. His tail might have a bit more movement if he was relaxed, his tail at the moment is more like he is being challenged for the mouse or he just walked out of a fight.

But otherwise you have amazing skills and i can't wait to see more from you in the future.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
11 out of 11 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

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:iconlunet12:
Lunet12 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2013  Student General Artist
This is awesome...v.v
Reply
:iconarchiemonty:
Archiemonty Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2013
My only small complaint would be the tail. it could have been just slightly thicker?
Reply
:iconduchesse1997:
duchesse1997 Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Student General Artist
Can I use it for a forum? Is it a free??
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Professional General Artist
You may use it if you credit me. :)
Reply
:iconduchesse1997:
duchesse1997 Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Student General Artist
okey thank you. But these not for me^^
Reply
:iconarchiemonty:
Archiemonty Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013
I second Shadowfox's comment. Very nicely done indeed!
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thanks!
Reply
:iconapplejaneblack:
AppleJaneBlack Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
awsomeeee <3
Reply
:iconbionicjess:
BionicJess Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
This is so cool! :D
Reply
:iconrusielewicz:
Rusielewicz Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Wow that is a wonderful animation!
Reply
:iconviky711:
Viky711 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I would love to write a critique about the wonderful details of this animation, but that feature isn't working for me. Anywho, this is amazing!
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thank you!
Reply
:iconviky711:
Viky711 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
No problem! You so deserved it!
Reply
:iconlynnstar98:
lynnstar98 Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is SO good! I love it! Just one tiny thing....I think you should ad some movement with the head.... But furhter I love it! <3
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thanks very much!
Reply
:iconlynnstar98:
lynnstar98 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Your very welcome! ^^
Reply
:iconcatz-r-cool:
catz-r-cool Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Sweet! I agree with Coilheart, I think the head could bob a tiny bit, too.
Reply
:iconisisloveya:
IsisLoveYa Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013
OMG!! This is soo!! cute!!! Omg OMG OMG OMGOMGOMG!!!!! :+fav::+fav::+fav::+fav:

I'm sorry i'm a little... :iconcrazycrazyplz: (<-- To be clear, irl i'm not like this :p)
Reply
:iconrainbowkitty13:
RainbowKitty13 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Awesome work :D
Reply
:icontrinitite:
Trinitite Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Student General Artist
WOW, PHENOMENAL.
Reply
:iconlittlesardines:
LittleSardines Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Professional Filmographer
AWESOME. I love the dead mouses tail flop - it's juust right!
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Professional General Artist
Bahaha glad you like!
Reply
:iconaudisey:
Audisey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Student General Artist
ERMAHGERD you animated a cat with STRIPES and it's perfect! Even Disney doesn't do that! IT'S BEAUTIMOUS.
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
I don't blame them LOL STRIPES ARE TOO MUCH
Reply
:iconaudisey:
Audisey Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Student General Artist
They are! Same with clothing, hence why it's usually simple. You are fantastic at animation. :D
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thank you! <3
Reply
:iconfireworkcat:
Fireworkcat Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this is amazing! i love how smooth the animation is. what program did you do this in?
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thanks again! <3 I use ToonBoom to animate. :)
Reply
:iconfireworkcat:
Fireworkcat Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Huh. Ive never heard of that Before.*looks up on google* oh! cool!
Reply
:iconrainbowkitty13:
RainbowKitty13 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Wow :O soooo awesome <3
Reply
:iconnathow111:
nathow111 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Cats do trot, though, I've seen them do it! It's either a gliding fast walk (like you've done here) or a bouncy not-quite-a-gallop that usually only lasts a couple of bounds.
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
I think what I have in mind for trotting is that happy high-leg thing dogs do when they're really excited to go walkies! I'm really glad you can what sort of walk this is! I worry, Lol @_@
Reply
:iconnathow111:
nathow111 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah, yes. Dogs have a stiffer, more energetic way of moving while cats are more fluid.
Reply
:iconxx-nightbanewolf-xx:
xX-NIGHTBANEWOLF-Xx Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Awesome, you are a better animator than me
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Haha well I have a degree in this, so I would be sad with myself if it were the other way around, lmao
Reply
:iconxx-nightbanewolf-xx:
xX-NIGHTBANEWOLF-Xx Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh, you do? Cool!
Reply
:icondelumier:
Delumier Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Looks cool! My only suggestion would be to maybe find a way to make the back move a bit? I know cats are graceful but it looks stiff at the moment.
Cats actually can trot - Sheba does it on a regular basis, but she usually moves a lot faster than Brambly here is when she's trotting. I haven't seen my other cats do it.
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thanks! I watched it again after a break (upside down on my iPod, which somehow helped LOL) and I definitely see what you mean about the stiff spine.

I think what I have in mind for "trot" is that happy, bouncy, high-leg thing dogs do when they're really excited (or horses, I think they do this too??). Not that I couldn't have done it anyway, since it's a cartoon! Haha
Reply
:icondelumier:
Delumier Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Student Digital Artist
I looked at it again and saw something else!
Watch the hind legs. One of them takes a longer step than the other - it's kind of hard to explain, but to me it kind of looks like he's lame in his left hind leg? Idk it could just be me but it'd be good to be aware of it :)
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Professional General Artist
Yeah that might be from holding a frame too long or because of the stripes not working. I'll take a look at it once I go back to this! Thanks ^^
Reply
:icondelumier:
Delumier Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Sweetness :D I'm pretty sure it's from holding a frame too long, cuz even if you viewed it as a silhouette I would see the hesitation on that leg, so :)
Reply
:iconchatterfox:
ChatterFox Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
I really like the fluidity of the movement you created(even if the framerate is offXD) and the little dips in the ears and tail are a nice touch:3 I would add that it does appear he is walking on a treadmill. His shoulders should move down a bit with his legs. So when his right paw goes towards the ground his shoulder dips with it. Also his head would be reacting to the movement as well, dipping down when his feet push off the ground. Have you looked at Muybridge's photographs of cats? I found those really helpful when they are put together and looped so I could compare his photos to my rough animation:3

Hope this helps!:3
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thanks for the compliment and feedback! <3 I used Muybridge's references for this actually! It was really helpful, though I found the backwards image ordering confusing at fist, Lol. You're definitely right about the hips and shoulders not moving enough. I didn't even notice it until I took a break and watched it again after all this good feedback! I personally think the bobbing head looks too cartoonish, especially for a cat (I need to try a drunk dog or something next to do some exaggeration, lmao). Anyway thank you again, it was really helpful! I have no idea why I'm not watching you either wtf your art has some really good movement
Reply
:iconchatterfox:
ChatterFox Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
I find Muybridge's photos so helpful(along with any videos of actual animals I can findXD) but yeah figuring out which picture goes first can take some timeXD

I'm happy I could help, getting outside feedback and even stepping back and watching really helps with animationX3 and yeah I could see how a bobbing head would add to the exaggeration:nod: drawing a drunk dog would be hilarious :D

Oh my goodness thank you!X3 I just love your works, your animations are so smooth and your paintings are beautiful:3
Reply
:iconkairu-hakubi:
Kairu-Hakubi Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
how can you not know that this is good?
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Because I'm the one who drew it, Lol
Reply
:icontether-cat:
Tether-Cat Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
The only thing I might recommend to show the cat actually has weight, is a little more up and down in the rear or shoulders, not much but just a little bit. Unless you were going for a weightless/floaty walk. Not sure if this helps any.
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
You're absolutely right - I can see it now, after taking a break. Thank you! ^^
Reply
:iconcristacake:
Cristacake Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh geeze this is perfection ;_; even with any little flaws you might see as the creator, it's still really great. You did amazing with this, with all the big things and the small details like the little jaw whiskers, the fur details around his legs and tail, and most of all that adorable little tail motion! :heart:
You are so amazing at animation!
Reply
:iconashkey:
ashkey Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Thank you very much! <3
Reply
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